Helping Kids Listen

"Ok, it's time to clean up. Help me put these blocks back in the box please."

I was wrapping up a home visit and the recently-turned one year old looked at me and smiled. 

She then did these three things in quick succession:

1. Picked up a block
2. Put it in the wooden box
3. And dumped all the blocks out again

"Oh, I'm so sorry!" the mom said, "She really is terrible at following directions."

Now it was my turn to smile. 

"No" I said reassuringly, "She did exactly what I asked of her. She helped me put a block back in the box. I never said anything about leaving it in there."

Turning back to the little girl I celebrated her achievement.

"Thank you for putting the yellow block in the box. That was helpful."

She beamed.

"We are all done playing and it's time for me to leave. This time we are going to put ALL the blocks in the box and leave them there."

Signing, 'my turn / your turn' we started while I narrated.

You put a blue block in the box.

My turn.

I put a red block in the box.

Your turn.

Remember, they are staying in the box this time. 

When we're done you can put the cover on! 

Mom turned to me, shocked, and said, "Oh my gosh, it worked! I didn't realized that I should be praising her for what she did do even if she dumped it again."

These are special moment into the psyche of our little people.

They want to make us happy and proud. 

They want to follow directions and see us beaming down at them when they do it 'right'.

Honestly, it's usually us who set them up to fail by projecting expectations on the outcome without clearly telling them how to get there.

And cheering for them each step of the way.

This week I share my #1 tip for helping your toddlers listen and how it empowers you to raise resilient kids.

Cara Tyrrell, M.Ed is mom to three girls, a Vermont based Early Childhood Educator, Collaborative Parenting Coach, and the founder of Core4Parenting. She is the passionate mastermind behind the Collaborative Parenting Methodology™, a birth-to-five, soul and science based framework that empowers toddler parents and educators  to turn tantrums into teachable moments. Through keynotes, teacher training, and her top-ranking podcast, Transforming the Toddler Years, she’s teaching the 5 Executive Functioning Skills kids need to navigate our ever-changing world.